Sunday, November 20, 2011

Partial List of Things That Happen While You're Gone Six Months

By the time I'd come to the end of typing this, I had to laugh. No comedy script could beat this, I'll wager!

  • Your DVR is stolen.
  • Your driver’s license is suspended.
  • Your vehicle registration is revoked.
  • Your fines accumulate compound interest.
  • Your so-called right to a hearing or appeal expires.
  • Your cars stop working.
  • Spiders take over your house.
  • Your children and/or grandchildren have birthdays.
  • Friends die.
  • The Internal Revenue Service discovers an error on your 2009 tax return, and you owe $300, counting all the piled-up penalties for not having replied by sometime in July.
  • You are summoned for jury duty and are informed there may be an arrest warrant out for you, as you never appeared. (Suddenly, we seem to have become outlaws in every respect.)
  • Your digestive system rebels and you contemplate setting up a cot in the bathroom.
 (Hint from Helen: Next time, you MUST hire some sort of service to go through your mail and notify you of anything that looks important.)
These are the issues that have occupied all our time since we came home; we haven’t even had time to begin planning the big family Thanksgiving to be held here. Oh, well, it’ll all come together one way or another, and we’ll still have plenty for which to be most grateful.

P.S.  Although we haven't had time to hook it up yet, our new DVR has arrived.  Things must be looking up, mustn't they?